I grew up wanting to look like my white friends from their blond hair and round eyes. I hated who I was because everyone made fun of my almond eyes and the fact that I was different. The worst was that teachers from school to Sunday School were also antagonizing. I will never forget when one of my Sunday School teachers taped a Snickers bar upside down to the board and asked me if I could read it. Everyone laughed (including myself), but it's things like this that have stayed with me over the years. I don't think I ever went back to Sunday School after that incident and ironically this teacher went on to adopt children of his own. I'd always hoped he didn't antagonize his own children like he had done to me that day.
I don't share this with you for your sympathy, but as a reminder that words hurt and even though they may be only words they stay with you. Yes, you can move on and forgive, but it's experiences like these that can cause you to have a different outlook. I became very bitter and hateful and pushed people away. I was so unhappy growing up and hated everyone and everything. It wasn't until I went to college that I learned to embrace these differences and be proud of who I was.
Self-esteem is something we all struggle with at one point or another. It's important to teach our children to love themselves, which can be difficult to do. The first step is learning to love ourselves and set an example; something I still struggle to do. I worry about the words that may get said to my own child and how I will handle his tears. I hope that I can set a good example and teach my son to love who he is. I want him to grow up loving life and loving who he is.
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| "Power to the People" |
